On Monday I was honored to attend a gathering to mourn the passing and celebrate the life of a great American bodhisattva.
Robert Thurman died on June 16 at his home in Woodstock, New York at the age of 84. He was probably the preeminent American Buddhist of our time—scholar, translator, Buddhist teacher, close friend of the Dalai Lama, key supporter of the Tibetan people. Bob Thurman’s brilliant mind, big heart, and larger-than-life personality were matched only by his many accomplishments in the service of the dharma.
The memorial service was held on August 3 at Menla Retreat and Spa, the Buddhism and wellness center in Phoenicia, New York established by Bob and his wife Nena. I attended as a longtime friend of Bob’s and to represent Lion’s Roar, which worked closely over the years with Bob, Nena, and the team at Tibet House.
The memorial began with the traditional 49-day ceremony for Bob performed by monks from Sera Jey Monastery in India. Forty-nine days is the length of time Tibetan Buddhists believe one spends in the bardo between death and rebirth, and it concludes with a special ritual to help the dead person achieve enlightenment in the bardo, or if not a good rebirth. Coincidently, August 3 was also Bob’s birthday.
Following the 49-day puja, family, friends, colleagues, students, and Buddhist leaders spoke eloquently and movingly about the ways Bob had touched their lives and about all the good he had done. They spoke of his pioneering career as a scholar who opened up Buddhist studies to practicing Buddhists. Of his brilliant translations of traditional Tibetan texts and his lively books that helped make Buddhism accessible and relevant in modern times. Of his founding of Tibet House and impassioned advocacy for the cause of Tibetan freedom. And of his role as a loving husband, father, and grandfather who, amid all his accomplishments and causes, always valued his family the most.
It all made me even more grateful to be a friend of this remarkable person. Bob always made me smile.
I and the Lion’s Roar team worked closely with Bob, his son Ganden, and Kira and Beata at Tibet House to produce the annual Dalai Lama Global Vision Summits. What I learned during our lively discussions/negotiations was that Bob was ultimately motivated by only one thing: how to create the most possible benefit.
I think that’s the definition of a bodhisattva: someone who amid all the challenges and eccentricities of this human life is concerned with one thing—creating benefit.
Bob Thurman wanted only to create benefit, and he succeeded, in a big way. To me, that makes him a great bodhisattva.
Read more on Robert Thurman’s legacy:
- Remembering Robert A.F. Thurman (1941-2026)
- Remembering the Boundless Heart of Robert A.F. Thurman
- Dalai Lama, Buddhist teachers and leaders share tributes to Robert A.F. Thurman
Teachings from Robert Thurman:
- Robert A.F. Thurman on Visualizing a Better World
- The Meaning of the Dalai Lama for Today
- Know Your Enemy (Sharon Salzberg and Robert Thurman)
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