Hi fellow people pleaser! I hope you’re doing well.
If you’re someone who struggles to say no, feels guilty about changing plans or disappointing someone, or automatically puts other people first while sidelining your own needs, you’re probably people pleasing. I’ve been trying to unlearn this habit lately too.
People pleasing can offer a strangely soothing illusion. Being easygoing, accommodating, and low-maintenance can feel safer than taking up space or risking disappointment. What I didn’t realise at first was how often I was abandoning myself and my needs in the process.
Saying yes when I was tired. Explaining myself too much. Feeling responsible for how everyone else felt and trying to fix it, even when it cost me my own peace. Over time, this can quietly erode the connection you have with yourself and leave you with a fragile sense of identity.
These affirmations come from that place of learning for me. They’re gentle reminders that people like me may need while unlearning people-pleasing and practicing boundaries in small, necessary ways.
Most affirmations that I write or say to myself don’t feel true at first. I don’t instantly believe them. But as I sit with them and let the words settle with me in my body, I notice myself feeling more reassured, soothed and calmer. They offer me permission I didn’t know how to give myself. Slowly, in subtle ways, they start to work.
If some of these don’t feel true right away, that’s okay. They didn’t for me either. I didn’t believe them at first. I noticed resistance, discomfort, and even a bit of disbelief. But I believe slowly, you may be able to soften to them and truly reinforce your belief onto them deeply. I hope these can help you in trusting yourself more and expressing more authentically.
Here are 30 affirmations that may help the part of you that needs it most:
- I am allowed to say no.
- I am allowed to change my mind.
- I am allowed to rest without earning it.
- I do not owe anyone constant availability.
- I believe in my goodness.
- I trust myself to be a kind person even when I may disappoint others.
- I am allowed to choose what works for me.
- I can have boundaries without justification.
- My needs carry equal importance to anyone else’s.
- I am not responsible for managing other people’s emotions.
- I can disappoint someone and still act with integrity.
- I do not need to over-explain my decisions.
- I am allowed to take up emotional and physical space.
- Love does not disappear when I set limits.
- I am allowed to take time before replying.
- Kindness does not require self-betrayal.
- I can protect my energy without guilt.
- I am safe even when someone feels displeased.
- I do not need to solve every problem around me.
- I am allowed to prioritise what feels aligned.
- My boundaries remain valid even when questioned.
- I can choose honesty and authenticity over being liked.
- I am allowed to change plans when my capacity shifts.
- I trust myself to handle uncomfortable moments.
- Respecting my limits does not make me selfish.
- I can be clear without being harsh.
- I do not need to make myself smaller to keep the peace.
- I am allowed to be authentic, even when it causes tension.
- Being misunderstood does not mean I am wrong.
- I deserve connections where I stay true to myself.
That’s all for now!
If this post brought anything up for you, you’re welcome to write to me at piyusha@gratefulness.me. I’m always open to hearing your thoughts and suggestions for future topics. I’d also love to know what kinds of affirmations you look forward to.
With this, I’m wishing you steady healing and gentle growth, in ways that help you feel more connected and aligned with yourself. Until next time 🤍
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